New Canaan Police on Aug. 27 arrested a 42-year-old local man by warrant in connection with a domestic incident that played out downtown earlier in the month, court records show.
Police charged the Danforth Drive man with second-degree threatening/physical threat, second-degree unlawful restraint and two counts of second-degree breach of peace following the Aug. 14 incident at Gofer Ice Cream on Main Street, according to an arrest warrant application obtained by NewCanaanite.com through a public records request.
At about 7:38 p.m. that Friday, police responded to the area of Elm and Main Streets to meet with the man regarding “a custody issue with his ex-wife,” according to the affidavit of NCPD Officer Rodger Hamilton that forms the major part of the application, signed Aug. 26 by state Superior Court judge John Blawie.
Arriving officers, including Hamilton and Officer Owen Ochs, found the man “speaking loudly on his phone to someone” and he “signaled to us to give him a minute,” the affidavit said. Police also could see the ex-wife with a female friend, crossing Main Street and walking toward them, each with one of their minor children, it said.
Standing in front of the Chase Bank on Main Street, the man confronted the two women “and began arguing with them,” and the two children began to cry, the arrest warrant application said. Officers separated them and Hamilton and Officer Shane Gibson spoke to the man while Ochs interviewed witnesses who had observed the confrontation at Gofer, it said.
The ex’s friend told police that at about 7:15 p.m. while at Gofer, the man and his parents “confronted them,” the affidavit said. She told police that the man “pushed her out of his way and told her to go [expletive] herself,” it said. He then approached the ex “and pushed her as well,” it said. The friend told police that “she tried to de-escalate the issue in front of the children, however [the man’s] anger was only escalating,” the affidavit said. When the two women began to walk away, he “blocked their pathway for them to leave.” The man didn’t want his child to go with them, though the juvenile said that they didn’t want to leave with their father “due to his display of anger,” it said. When they began to walk away, the man “began to follow them up Main Street, yelling and cursing at them,” the affidavit said.
In speaking to the ex-wife, police said they learned that a judge had ruled that same day against the father “regarding which schools the children will attend” and that the man “was very upset” because he had lost his motion in court, the arrest warrant application said.
After the court hearing, the ex-wife approached the man “and suggested that they meet up this evening with the kids to have donuts or ice cream to discuss how they were going to move forward,” to which the man responded, “[expletive] you,” it said.
The two women had plans to go to South End restaurant on Elm Street, and at about 6 p.m. one of the exes’ children phoned her at 6 p.m. to say that the two children would be going to Spiga restaurant in New Canaan for dinner with the man and his parents, the application said. After dinner at South End, the two women walked to Spiga “to say hi to the children,” it said. There, “she was confronted by [her ex] and his parents,” so the pair left and went to Gofer with the friend’s child. While they ate ice cream outside Gofer, the man approached his ex-wife and said “what the [expletive] are you doing here?” and told her to leave, the application said. The pair then spoke in front of The Toy Chest store, where the man could be heard telling his ex to “[expletive] herself” and “I’m going to [expletive] kill you,” the friend told police, according to Hamilton’s affidavit.
The child who had come over from Spiga was with the women, at this, point and though the man “tried to grab” the child from his ex’s arms, he “was unsuccessful,” the arrest warrant application said. (No one was injured in the exchange, it said.)
The man told police a different story, according to the arrest warrant application. He said that he was having dinner with his parents and children at Spiga when the two women “came over to their table and interrupted them with huge smiles to say ‘hi,’ ” it said. Everyone “remained cordial during the interruption” and finished dinner, the man told police, then he walked with his kids to Gofer, where the two women “were inside” and “waiting for them.” Inside, he asked his ex to speak privately but when she refused he said to her “What the [expletive]?” in a “slightly raised voice.” He then tried to console one of his children, who was upset, and when his ex picked up the child to leave with her friend, he phoned 9-1-1, the affidavit said.
Two witnesses provided sworn statements that appeared to back the ex-wife’s account. One of them told police she could see the man “screaming” into his ex’s face “at close range” while one of the children sat on her lap, and that when she “tried to get up from her chair” the man “blocked her path,” the arrest warrant application said. Another witness corroborated the account.
Police traveled to the man’s Danforth Drive home to take him into custody at about 12:40 p.m. on Aug. 27. He was released after promising to appear the following day in state Superior Court.
The man remains released on a promise to appear, according to Connecticut Judicial Branch records. He has not pleaded and is represented by Fairfield-based Koffsky & Felsen LLC. His arraignment is now scheduled for Oct. 6.
According to the arrest warrant application, the man now resides in Stamford.
Conditions of release include a protective order, the arrest warrant said. The case has been referred to Family Services, it said.
(Second-degree breach of peace is the same charge that New Canaan Police sought to bring against a former sitting first selectman following a sudden outburst at Town Hall on Veterans Day in 2022. However, the NCPD arrest warrant application was not signed by the state’s attorney’s office and no arrest was made.)
The Domestic Violence Crisis Center in Stamford provides services, support and education for the prevention and elimination of domestic violence. Its 24-hour hotline is 888-774-2900. To reach DVCC offices during regular business hours, the number is 203-588-9100. Services are free and confidential, multilingual and multicultural. Here’s a recent Q&A with the organization’s executive director. Here is information on the “Domestic Violence Survivor Support Fund” managed by the New Canaan Community Foundation.