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Full Disclosure: Summer, It’s Not About Me

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Do you know why New Canaan is spelled with three ‘A’s? It’s to account for the high concentration of Type ‘A’ personalities that have settled in our small, idyllic village. 

Yet it seems that even the most high-strung New Canaanites have embraced summer, or fled town entirely. In fact, I would like to report a mass evacu-cation and thank most of New Canaan for skipping town to enjoy summer elsewhere. 

During the seasonal mass exodus, some of us enjoy VIP parking along Elm Street and exceptional personal service-with-a-smile wherever we go. I even saw a benevolent parking enforcement officer let an infraction go—now, if that isn’t a harbinger of good things to come, then I don’t know what is. 

One could get used to this ease of everyday life in New Canaan. However, I am still wound as tight as ever trying to figure out my summer rhythm.

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Full Disclosure: Revenge of the Nerds

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I am not a fan of putting labels on people. However, after watching all eight seasons of “Games of Thrones,” I see how some carry weight. I, Susan of House Gelvin, First of Her Name, Breaker of Appliances and Protector of Retail Shopping, could get used to this kind of name-calling. The label I particularly dislike is ‘nerd.’ Yet I am surrounded by many self-proclaimed nerds who wear the label as a badge of honor. To me, the term insults those who are dedicated to intellectual pursuits.

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Full Disclosure: A Cautionary Tale

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Our doorbell has been out of commission for months and it has not phased me one bit. 

Fully embracing my inner shut-in, I am not at all anxious that I have missed any truly important visitors, like the angelic Girl Scout cookie peddlers or an unannounced Oprah ambush. I may have even avoided uncomfortable interactions with dreaded door-to-door salesfolk, wandering environmentalists and the occasional drive-by serial killer. 

Weeks ago, Aquarion Water Company must have come a’calling—and since I am visitor-proof, they left an urgent notice on our doorknob. By the way, nothing says *urgent* like a white luggage tag on the front door. I was instructed to contact the company immediately regarding a water leak on our property. 

Most people would have called Aquarion pronto to get to the bottom of the bad news. Instead, I decided to marinate in the information and torment myself with a visual loop of worst-case scenarios.

Full Disclosure

Full Disclosure: Unknown Caller

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It’s official, the subtle art of dodging a phone call has been lost. Most New Canaanites simply avoid answering the phone anymore, unless of course, it is the Office of Emergency Management calling with timely, critical information. We have all been burned far too many times to think that the person on the end of the line is truly who Caller ID says they are—I am talking to you, Somali Pirate, who has been trying to lure me into a phone conversation for months. I remember the glorious moment when Caller ID first rolled out and became a standard operating feature. It was the dawn of a new day to gain the inside track on who had dialed.

Full Disclosure

Full Disclosure: The Email That Launched a Thousand Emails

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On Valentine’s Day, many hearts simultaneously broke throughout New Canaan with a single widely distributed email. 

As some swooned over loved ones or batted eyelashes at a crush, the much adored and longstanding principal of South School, Joanne Rocco, announced her retirement in an email to parents. 

It was an email that launched a thousand forwarded messages, and reduced many to tears. 

I received numerous frantic messages about the breaking news—or shall I say, heartbreaking news. Though I no longer have students at South, I felt a mix of immense sorrow for those families who will not know Ms. Rocco and absolute triumph that my kids attended “her” school. My family had six blissful years reaping the rewards of Joanne’s hard work and tenure. The thought of her absence is a big blow to our community. 

And to pile on the hurt, it seems that our schools are getting hit hard this winter. Our Board of Education is fighting an uphill battle with town bodies to fully fund its proposed budget while in Hartford, the state government is flexing its muscular overreach, introducing bills that call for school regionalization. 

I have officially exceeded my threshold and cannot take any more unexpected news regarding our schools.